The Cards
Say To
Break Up
With Him
(Dot Com)

CUT-RATE CLAIRVOYANCE!
 💸
STILL EXTREMELY CLAIRVOYANT!! 
 🔮

TAROT READINGS, 24/7* – CALL OR TEXT:
475-882-2737
("I    S  L  U  T    C  A  R  D  S")

 

Oh, hi. I'm Nate.

And I am here to convey unto you
S P I R I T U A L   G U I D A N C E
that definitely won't just amount to:

"You should break up with your boyfriend."
"And/or quit your job."

We'll chat, I'll give you some thoughts / advice to think on,
and it'll all honeslty probably be weirdly on-point.

 

IN-PERSON & VIDEO TAROT READINGS,
FROM A PERSON WHO HAS
DONE THEM BEFORE**

I have been reading the cards for over a decade now, and I definitely have a bachelor's in psychology, so I am extremely qualified to advise you on all manner of things:

  • LOVE & ROMANCE! 💖
  • YOUR CAREER! 💰️
  • THE FUTURE IN GENERAL! ⚰️
  • YOUR TERRIBLE BOYFRIEND! 🧛‍♂️
  • OTHER THINGS, I'M SURE! 🥀
 

** Deck pics available upon request.

AVAILABLE ANY TIME,
DAY OR NIGHT*

Call or text, and we'll set up a time to chat –
that same night if it's urgent! And then I will
give you much good guidance, backed by the
wisdom of actual spooks and spectres.

 


NOTE: If a phone call is feelin' a little much,
you're also welcome to email me to set something up:

nate@thecardssaytobreakupwithhim.com ¯

 

READINGS ARE PRICED BY ANGEL NUMBER,
BECAUSE I KNOW Y'ALL LOVE THOSE

$11.11
for 5 minutes!		Quick-and-dirty single-card emergency reading!
$22.22
for 10 minutes!		Simple past/present/future 3-card spread!
$33.33
for 20 minutes!		Full Celtic Cross reading –
a full narrative down to the nitty-gritty details!
$44.44
for 30 minutes!		Celtic Cross + some cool extra meandering wisdom;
maybe a short follow-up read!
$77.77
for 60 minutes!		Multiple readings,
OR we just really get into how terrible He is!
$99.99
for 90 minutes!		We’re just straight-up best friends now!

P.S – Follow our insta, for regular discounts on readings, if you'll help spread the word about us a little.

Tips are always appreciated, but they will not change the reading. The future cannot be bought. But!
Every dollar you donate goes directly to helping me thin the Veil to the Spirit Realm. (e.g., wine, Xanax, et al)

 

@n8n8n8

Reasonably cheap! Reasonably accurate!
Call or text "I-SLUT-CARDS"
I'll be expecting you.

@TheCardsSayTo

 

 

Frequently Asked Questions ["FAQ"]

So, are you actually psychic, or what?

Blah blah.

How can I get a reading?

Where are you located?

Do you group readings?

Uh, so are you going to say anything to cover your ass?

 

 

* The hotline is OPEN 24/7. Whether or not I ANSWER...
I might be sleeping or drinking or having a mood disorder.
Nights generally better. Texts generally less horrifying.
Or just email: nate@thecardssaytobreakupwithhim.com

 

LAST UPDATED: 7/14/25 – Genius marketer that I am, I forgot to mention up front that tarot readings are the service I offer. Lots of content updates. Now it just needs to look tackier!